Hanging On and Letting Go

I've been climbing the last few weeks around Moab, Utah; and today I'm taking a well-deserved, long-overdue rest day.

For those of you unfamiliar with rest days, they are the non-climbing days of a climbing trip. Sometimes voluntary, often involuntary, they provide the time and space for reflection and a couple of fish tacos. Living in the desert, these side trips also provide the only link to the real world - and by that I mean showers, beer, laundry, and the internet.

So what am I learning out here? There's been some interesting duality to my spring - learning about both holding on and letting go.

By holding on... I mean hanging in there when the climbing gets tough. Trying harder. Falling on my on-sight attempt of Quarter of a Man was disappointing, but I believe it also opened a door. I tried hard. I failed. But trying hard and failing felt better than giving up or not trying at all. Somehow, ironically, that failure helped me unearth some confidence. Sounds crazy, sure; but in the 24 hours following that attempt, I red-pointed three new climbs. Just like that... go figure.

By letting go... I mean freeing your mind of all the noise in the past, the future, and the sideways (for more on sideways, see Lost, Final Season) and fully experiencing the present. My friend Mary Beth is about to begin a 10-day vipassana meditation; but I'd like to believe that through the potent energy of the desert, I have a window into similar lessons without the knee pain.

I'm also learning about happiness, by reading Dan Gilbert's Stumbling on Happiness. He's sort of a cross between Malcolm Gladwell and David Sedaris. I had the pleasure of dining with him years ago in Paris, where he told me my life is all about rejecting the status quo. I'm not sure that was a compliment, but I liked hearing it at the time. Sort of a psychological explanation for my life's twists and turns. Anyway, his book is less self-help than why self-help doesn't work. Check him out.

A few other musings from my world out here:

1. To the guy trying to fix his Eurovan here in the bakery by calling every store in a six-hour radius with a potential radiator hose to sell, I have two words for you.... indoor voice.

2. When the topo says 'do not approach in a storm,' perhaps there is a reason. Ever fishtail on mud? I didn't even make it to the 'steep switchbacks,' and I have mud embedded in my tires that will likely outlast the remaining warranty on my car.

3. Next time I climb the North Face of Castleton, I will tape my forearms. The next time I climb Fine Jade, I will sack up for my lead.

4. Listen to your belayer when he says 'your gear's good... now climb.' Better yet, develop the inner voice to tell that to yourself.

5. Fish tacos. Yum. I may not forgive the Wake and Bake cafe for switching the bookstore and cafe to opposite sides of the store (makes me feel like I'm in a funny house with distorted mirrors); but the fish tacos go a long way to make up for it.

Have a great weekend, everyone!